Hello beautiful people, whats poppin?? I know there are diverse readers out there who come from different backgrounds, this short story is about a woman who tries to make things better with her daughter who she left as a child. If my mom ever wrote a letter it's how i see it going down in my head so...enjoy!!



Ada,
  Today you are 16 and old enough to understand my actions. I love you with all my heart, and everyday i regret not being in your life, i regret not being there for all your tears, laughs, triumphs, i deeply regret that someone else holds my place in your heart but know that you would always have mine. I know the thoughts currently running through your mind; why am i writing you now? What do i want from you? Baby i hope that by the end of this letter you will have all your questions answered.
I remember many years ago as a youth i never really knew what i wanted in life, my friends and the people around me had figured out their lives, some wanted to go to the university, some wanted to travel, others wanted to get married, but i didn't know what i wanted to do with my life and sadly didn't find out until it was too late .
I would never forget January 16 1997 , i was on my way to my mother's store when i met the man of my youthful dreams; your father (moon as he was known) i always wondered why they called him moon; maybe because he was as dreamy as the moon, he had everything i thought a man ought have, a fair skin and a heart to match, a gentle voice and soul. A lot of girls would have gladly followed him to the ends of the earth but for unknown reasons he chose and courted me. When your father came into my life i was so taken with him i stopped worrying about my life and instead filled it with him, which is why when i became pregnant it was easier to just marry him, i didn't know how to survive out in the world on my own, so  i married him. I married him because it was the easiest way, i married him knowing i was being selfish for i could never truly love him the way he did me, i married him even though i knew i shouldn't have and for that singular act i'm sorry.
We were married for five years; during the first two years i tried my best to make it work, i tried my best to bury my restlessness because i had the most precious gift in the world; you. But as the years went by the pull in my heart became stronger and i could no longer ignore it. I realised that what i wanted to be, "who" i'd wanted to be had always been right in front of me but i didn't see it. I wanted to be happy and being a housewife didn't make me happy. I think your father sensed me pulling away from him, i think deep down he had always known i was never truly his but when he sensed my restlessness he began to truly fear and did all he could to make me stay, but i couldn't.
Baby i'm sorry for being a coward, when moon went to work one morning i packed some of the important things i held dear to me. I packed light so he wouldn't notice, you might not remember but when you were little you had this teddy bear you carried everywhere, i hated that teddy, always thought it looked creepy but you loved it, you might not remember it because i took it with me, baby girl i took it with me because i couldn't take you. I was on a journey and i couldn't uproot you from a cozy life with loved ones to one of uncertainty, i knew moon would take care of you and love you more than i ever could, and from what i've heard i was right. Yes baby girl i've had my eyes on you for a long time now and i always will. I've been to your school, i've watched you play, i've watched you grow but i'm afraid that's all i can ever do; watch from the sidelines. 
I regret that i can't have you in my life but i don't regret the choices i made, i don't regret leaving you with moon, i can only hope that perhaps one day you would feel better towards me. I have to stop here but before i go tell your father i'm sorry, for i know i hurt him deeply, i know i shattered him the night i left, i almost changed my mind a million times before i reached the door, but i had to go. Tell him hurting him was the most painful thing i have ever gone through, tell him i don't deserve him.. i never did. You and your dad are the only family i have and always will have, everything i am/have is yours when i'm gone, for i fear it will be soon. I just needed to know that i told you how much i love you and how much you mean to me before i no longer can. Take care of your father for me.. tell him to remember the days spent outside mama's store, tell him to never forget the smiles he put on my face. I know i'm being selfish but i pray he never forgets me. Until we meet to part no more my beautiful angel, goodbye.
                                       your mother,
                                         chidiadi.


Hope you enjoyed this and reading it wasn't too tedious for you. PLEEEASSSE share your thoughts with me. thanks.